Mother Knows Best Burger

Burger Club loves moms. Those brave women instilled in each of us a deep love for buttery meat. Dads often get the credit for being grillmaster, but if it weren’t for mom, we’d never develop our refined taste for a well-seasoned patty and a buttery bun. Knowing this, it seemed fitting that when Jane’s mom came to town, we’d have to take her out with us. We got so excited about it, in fact, that we almost flew in all four burger mothers for the occasion. Unfortunately time and budget weren’t our friends, but Mama Sluss did her best to represent all the mothers out there. 

A quick search for “Mother”, “Burger”, and “NYC” produced (not surprisingly) Mother Burger. Way to go, Google. Bex & Roger were familiar with the place, since it’s near their office. So, despite the less than stellar reviews and a little bit of “history” with this burger, we decided that it worked for the theme.

One look at the Mother Burger shack and you realize it’s a convenience burger. It’s maybe close to your work, but you probably wouldn’t head out of your way for it. The inside is both kitschy and tiny, but there’s an abundance of outdoor seating, which probably makes it a good lunch option. If you’re feeling particularly “wacky” (I imagine that’s how the people here talk), you might go after work with your colleagues for happy hour drinks & burgers. If Office Space took place in NYC, Jennifer Aniston would need to triple her flare to work here, if only to compete with the glorious, enormous cow suspended on the wall above the bar. 

Let’s get down to the burgers. We all ordered pretty much according to tradition, but with the addition of a new member, we had some extra options. And so, Mama Sluss, proved that Mother really knows best, ordering the Mother’s Nacho Burger. This brilliant masterpiece comes topped with tomato, jalapenos, guacamole, and what is billed on the menu as “Pepper Jack cheese” but which is, in reality, the same type of cheese sauce you get on movie theater nachos. Which sounds disgusting, but was in fact, amazing. So, if you check out this joint, be sure to do as mother does, and eat as mama eats. Otherwise, the burgers were ho-hum, but see what we each had to say 
about it.

Jane:
I got a boring cheeseburger, which was all right, but lacked flavor. The bun was a bit better than I would’ve expected with a decent butteriness. Since we had to pay extra, we didn’t order too many fries, which was good because there weren’t great. Luckily, my mom ordered a waaaay better burger, and being my mom, let me have almost half of hers. Unlike mine, her burger was freakin’ awesome. Nacho cheese on a burger is a revelation. I have a friend who swears that the secret to Shake Shack’s sauce is Kraft Mac-n-Cheese mix. While I still don’t believe this, I do think that processed cheese sauce + burger = good. So while mine was prob a 2.5 cow burger, I’ll overall rate this at 3 since hers elevated my opinion of the whole place.
Jane rates:  3 cows

Mama Sluss:
Well, she couldn’t be bothered for a whole review, but her comment that evening pretty much sums up her thoughts about the burger: “The chips created an exciting crunch in my mouth.”
Mama Sluss rates:   4 cows

Bex:  
Mother Burger has nothing really to do with mothers so I’m glad we had Jane’s mom there! Most of the people in the restaurant/bar at 7:30pm on this Tuesday were young groups of friends or couples, eating burgers and drinking beer.  The atmosphere has a “TGIF” kind of feel to it with wacky stuff on the walls, streamers and lights hanging from the bar, and a giant cow up towards the ceiling. The burger is a bit on the expensive side for what you get, especially since you have to order fries separately.  I did enjoy the burger though, although it didn’t blow me away.  The bun could have been better but all the toppings (lettuce, red onion, tomato, pickles) were fresh and tasty.  The meat was ok, definitely cooked well done, nothing special there.  I did like the special sauce that came on the side, it had a bit of chipotle in it, and I used the remainder to dip my fries in.  The fries were WAY too salty but still fries, so I ate them.   
Bex rates: 3 cows

Anna:

You might not find mothers in Mother Burger, but you’ll find plenty of tattoos of the word, “mother.”  Although Mama Sluss was the awesome exception to the demographic.  Staked cases of Miller Light were piled against the window, obviously a beacon calling to all mothers, and our table was pushed against the cases, so that all space was maximized.  Moving anywhere required lots of dodging and walking sideways, a testament to the popularity of Mother Burger.  The meat itself was great--hormone and antibiotic free.  My mom would approve.  I agree with Bex on the sauce, but I liked the buns, doughy, ordinary, and perfectly sized.  Our waitress was exceptional and went out of her way to get us anything we needed.  By that, I mean she got me a side salad, which they usually don’t do, and I’m trying to eat more vegetables.  Roger’s fries were a bit stale and salty, but doused in ketchup, they limbered up a bit.   

Anna rates: 3 cows

Roger:
Yeah I didn’t like the fries. They were salty and that's it. They seemed like fries you would get frozen at Costco. Nothing against Costco, I just think a burger place should put some effort into their fries. The burger was OK. I made the mistake of showing up super hungry so I quickly ate it.  The place was pretty loud too. It could have been the happy hour crowd but it made it difficult at times to hear Mama Sluss. The last time I was there I didn’t remember it being so loud but it was during lunch. Honestly I could take or leave Mother Burger. It’s really too bad because I love the name.
Roger: 2 cows and a calf

Burger Club rates Mother Burger:

Mother Burger

329 West 49th Street
New York, NY 10019